You brought me a rose

I threw my keys against the wall
Whilst sporting a dangerous smile,
All over the dishes that still sat in the sink
When I got home from work,
Because in the silence that fell after the words
“I love you” ran from my lips to your ears
I drew up my most impenetrable fortress
And acted like a fool who believed in
Either love or disrespect,
Forgetting the world is never black and white.

And after acting like a child
And a bitch
And all those other roles
That demanded to know if you were leaving
(Determined for you to play the secondary
Character of “coward” in my drama)
You proved me wrong yet again
By bringing me back a world of colour
In the form of a rose,
A rose I could not feel less worthy of.
And in my selfish self-hatred
I was so quick to find thorns
Instead of beauty
And fall into my evil assumptions
That you just needed something temporary from me.

You brought me a red rose
And yet all I can see is
A big red button of self-destruction
That you keep gently moving
My past-smeared fingers
Away from.

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